FURTHER UPDATE

We have spent the past two weeks battling for my husband and myself to get the help we need. We are both exhausted with fighting as the powers that be seem to think that my husband is well enough to look after me. However this is not true and we don’t seem able to get across to them our very real needs. Sometimes we reach the point of absolute exhaustion and despair. I have, as you will see, attempted to keep going and also to keep writing my book. I have no doubt that in some way we will manage to rise above this, but it is extremely hard right now. We feel quite desolate. It seems that you have to fit into a certain mould and all that happened when we were assessed was that they filled in tick boxes. They then made decisions without ever having seen us as it was done over the phone.

I try to make my poems have an upturn even if they are sad but I am not sure at this moment that I will be able to keep doing that. I do not want to write miserable stuff but I do feel quite miserable right now. We are seeking a way through and I guess we will find it eventually, but if my poetry appears sad, this is why. Perhaps if I try to live in my memories it will help. But at the moment living in the future is impossible and even the present moment has its desperation. Part of the problem is my sudden going completely blind and receiving no help in how to live as a blind person. I find it very frightening and I know that there are a lot of people who are blind who live a full and fruitful life but it has happened to me late in life and I need teaching how to be blind. We have sought this kind of. Help but cannot find it. I guess it is because I am what is often called a golden oldie. If I was younger I have no doubt that they would help me. Inside myself I am still very very alive. My spirit is raring to go but I am hampered by both the pain in my body and my blindness. Please forgive if my poetry should appear very sad and despairing at the moment. Please bear with me

8 thoughts on “FURTHER UPDATE

  1. Oh Lorraine, thank you for this update even though it is a sad one to hear. I think giving yourself permission to release that sadness in your words is important, although I do understand the desire to want what you write to be uplifting.
    Remember to extend yourself some compassion… you are going through a lot. Sending you lots of Love, Bree (aka. Secrets)

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I’m sorry to hear about this battle you have to fight when I’m sure it’s the last thing you need. Stay strong, stay hopeful and keep writing 🙏

    Like

  3. blindzanygirl

    Thanks Ingrid. We have been fighting for over two years to get some help. Just recently things have become almost an emergency and yet still we have the battle. Indeed I will stay strong and keep writing. It may be a bit sad than usual though LOL

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Well at least you manage to keep smiling through it all. I don’t know what to say really, other than the system is failing badly if it can’t help people who have a genuine need.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. blindzanygirl

    I “lost” them Bree. I don’t know what I am doing half the time lol. I loved your latest poem by the way. I am not sure if my comment went through. But oh how I could relate to it. A wonderful poem ❤️

    Like

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