Sarah longed for it to be ANOTHER DAY. But if it were possible to have another day, which day would she choose? It would have to be a day before cancer struck. Before that dreadful itch began. Before all this.
She often looked back to what it was like before “all this”, knowing that it could never be like that again. She meditated, often, on how life can change in one quick instant. There is a before and an after. She knew that in some ways it was not good to look back, but it was impossible now to look forwards. There was no future for her – well, not a future worth talking of anyway. Life was passing her by. When she was a child, the age she was now had seemed old. You were an old lady if you got to this age. But she was not old. Not in her brain anyway. In her brain she was still tripping the light fantastic. It was frightening though. The years had gone so fast.
Sarah shifted herself in her bed. That was where she spent most of her days now. The pain in her body overcame her sometimes, but if she could shift about a bit she cold sometimes stop the pain getting any worse. She tried to make some things out in her bedroom, but she couldn’t because she was blind. That was what the chemo had done to her. Cured the cancer but wrecked her body. Sometimes she couldn’t breathe very well either – that was due to the chemo drugs too. And the fatigue. Oh, the fatigue! No one, only her, knew how bad that really was. Sometimes even eating exhausted her.
Another day. Another day of this. Did she really want another day? If the truth be known, no, she ddn’t.